Lately, I have needed some wise council on a few things going on in my life. I was very nervous about taking to someone about them because I felt silly...foolish...weak....a tattle tale...a whiner....not dependent on the Lord, I will stop here. But I heard someone speak at a conference this past winter and what she said was clearly from the Lord...permission to seek wise council.
I have learned many things from talking to this council, things which surprised me about myself. But one thought has truly changed my life, my stress load and how I view my job here on earth...
IT'S NOT MY PROBLEM!!!
They are simple words, and I surely don't yell them, although truth be told I would LOVE to. But they are simple. I have viewed many situations, emotions, outcomes to be my responsibility...not my emotions and outcomes but others. And these 4 little words are to me a revelation.
Many problems and situations out there are not mine to bear. If someone woke up in a bad mood, it is not my problem that they are not happy. If someone did not finish a responsibility they took on, and will/are suffering consequences, that was not my fault and I am not to take on the responsibility for this
If I say something that is truth, and not hurtful or intended to hurt, but to point out a situation that needs attending, their reaction is not my responsibility. I have so much I AM responsible for..my thoughts, the intentions of my heart, my words, my actions. But someones else's is not mine to take...and I am actually hurting them (and myself) by taking it.
This is probably a very simple, already-done-that-thought for most of you...but it takes me YEARS to get things. It will probably take me years to learn not take on everyone's STUFF.
SO.... if you happen to tell me something, and expect me to somehow fix it or take the blame for it..BEWARE...
I will probably look at you very sweetly, smile, and say...
IT'S NOT MY PROBLEM!!!
thanks for reading,
Reb
umm, i agree with you up to a point. i want people to know im willing to listen and although not fix it, i can always pray for them and their situation. i agree you reap what you sow and the consequences. sometimes tho we just need an ear to vent to.
ReplyDeleteRebecca....I SOOOOOOOO needed to read this today! In fact, I'm going to use your new phrase later today at two dreaded encounters! :) God is so good, I'm thankful for the few minutes I had to eat lunch and read a few wise words from a friend.
ReplyDeleteYou need a larger reader population. I wish that everyone could grasp that at a young age. It has taken me many years, and I'm still trying to work through it. I love it! It's not my problem. So simple, yet so hard to incorporate into one's life.
ReplyDeleteWell. like I said...it's not my problem you didn't like me when we were little! I'm so glad you got that council...it sure has helped me too :)
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